When your team is stuck or at odds with one another, it’s not unlike the weight we feel when the atmospheric pressure has dropped. We often feel drained, and we move more slowly. Some of us get a headache. Cultivating healthy engagement across the team is one way to raise the barometric pressure and make room for clear and inviting skies. Healthy engagement happens when your team and … [Read more...]
Emotional Intelligence
Completing the Emotional Intelligence Puzzle
Mastering any one of the four primary Emotional Intelligence competencies can go a long way toward helping a leader improve her effectiveness. And, understanding the relationships between each and their interdependencies can magnify that leadership value even further. A framework for remembering the four Emotional Intelligence elements is to organize them into a logical matrix. On the … [Read more...]
Relationships Rule
Of the four Emotional Intelligence (EI) competencies, retaining, growing and managing relationships is one of the more challenging to master. For one, it requires an investment of time and energy, sometimes with no immediate “pay-off.” It invites vulnerability, which, let’s face it, is not always comfortable. It also depends on the other three EI skills (Self-Awareness, … [Read more...]
Put your Social Awareness Antenna to Work
You walk into a conference room for a 10AM meeting. Five minutes into the meeting, you notice the following: Two angst-ridden people from the same department tapping feverishly on their phones One person with his laptop open intensely pounding out an email The quiet person on your team sitting back from the table at the far end The not-so-quiet person on your team already energized and offering … [Read more...]
Manage Thyself
Managing oneself is a key aspect of Emotional Intelligence (EI) and confounds many leaders. Let’s face it, being aware of a behavior that doesn’t serve us well is one thing; it’s quite another to exercise a suitable alternative when we’re in the heat of the moment. Let’s begin by sharing some examples of what it means to self-manage. Leaders who self-manage well tend to… … call … [Read more...]
Know Thyself … Including Thy Blind Spots
Pop Quiz: Have you ever felt impatient and annoyed with a person sauntering in late to a meeting you’re running? Have you ever fantasized about something unpleasant happening to a co-worker who has a way of taking all the credit? Have you ever raised your voice in order to be heard in a conference room filled with a lot of opinions? Or, are you more likely to withdraw in that … [Read more...]
The Possible Dream … Work-Life Balance
An article from Entrepreneur highlights some interesting research noting that 66 percent of full-time employees strongly believe they don’t have work-life balance. In our “always on” world this is probably no surprise. Nonetheless, that does not mean a healthy work-life balance isn’t achievable for you and your team. Afterall, as a leader, your team looks to you to set the pace and to model … [Read more...]
How True is it?
Even the best leaders live with limiting beliefs and assumptions that compromise decision-making and ultimately, their value. One of my favorite questions for inviting reflection and challenging limiting beliefs and assumptions is: “How True is it?” Here are a few examples of limiting beliefs and assumptions that keep leaders from playing all-in and initiating change for themselves and … [Read more...]
Where do you take yourself out of the game?
We all have our tipping points: We decide whether to “pass” or roll the dice depending on the risk we assign to the next move. While we know intellectually that growth and change rarely happen without some level of discomfort, most of us are not inclined to put ourselves in harm’s way. We’d much prefer to remain safe and dodge the prickly emotions that arise if our actions don’t yield … [Read more...]
What Are You Tolerating?
This is the “finger in the rib” question. If you put your index finger on your rib and apply light pressure, most people feel irritated, but still are able to carry on. Over time, you may even start accepting the annoyance as “normal” and a part of what you signed up for when you took this position. Our self-talk includes phrases like, “well, nothing’s perfect,” or “I have bigger battles to … [Read more...]